Saturday, December 29, 2007

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Funny...

"It's what I do during my presidency. I go around spreading good will and talking about the importance of spreading freedom and peace."

-- George W. Bush
I'm going to go out on a limb and say that this is probably one of those moments where the body of George is stumbling around or dancing behind a podium like a child with a bladder full of Kool Aid, and the cute little bean that is the president's brain is off somewhere in a land of ponies and strippers powdered heavily with Yale-grade cocaine like a box full of donettes.

Mmmm... donuts and strippers...


But, freedom and peace?!? From George Bush?!? And he thinks he's spreading those things?

Man... I'm going to say that the bubble in which George lives has got to be a pretty amazing and surreal piece of real estate. I obviously doesn't appear to have any windows, and I'm sure he doesn't get either TV or radio in there anywhere, but are those things really necessary when you're living in such a perfect little fantasy land?

Freedom and peace...

I'm going to have to say no, Gawdge. And, while you're curled up in your safe little magical bubble of complete obliviousness, perhaps you can have one of your handlers print out and read to you this list of 293 scandals which have plagued your inept, incompetent and downright corrupt administration. And, if that doesn't wake you up, how about a list of your most pathetically embarrassing and flat-out dumbest legal arguments of the year.

Still need more? Hmmm.... Well, since you're so keen on freedom (which you oddly define as the indefinite imprisonment and brutal torture of anyone your band of goons and thugs arbitrarily deems suspect), here's a sweet story of how your America imprisoned and tortured an innocent beauty from Iceland.

Then again, that Iceland chick? Yeah. I'm sure she was a threat or an enemy combatant willing to unleash the next wave of terror upon America by singing karaoke versions of Bjork songs. If that's the case, then thank god for you sir. You have kept us safe.

Dude? Did you ever stop to think that maybe the reason why you can't solve a single problem in the United states is because there's a damn good chance that you are the problem?

Still though... George Bush talking about freedom and peace has got to be one of the most tragically hypocritical statements of all time. You see, George, war-mongering fountains of incessant, nebulous threats who torture innocent people do not, under any circumstance, get to say they are "spreading freedom and peace."

However, Mr. Bush, you're definitely spreading something, aren't you?

So, do us all a favor and just lock yourself in a closet for the next 56 weeks and let the grown-ups have their country back. We'll give you donuts and some small, shiny object with which to pass your time.



Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 12/29/2007 09:28:00 PM


  1. Just keep a few donuts for yourself -- seemingly on New Year's (Day I think, or perhaps Eve), eating circular items is supposed to be lucky.  In some country, they eat a lot of doughnuts / donuts.  I like that idea better than gagging at the thought of the quote you posted by Shrub.

  2. Oh man...don't shame Kool Aid & Donettes by associating them with Bush! They didn't do anything to desire that! They have been sooooo good to us over the years! :-) Let Bush enjoy the his defined Freedom himself! That is the best punishment! What the heck is this guy going to do when he is out of office? Seriously, who is going to take him seriously?