Saturday, May 31, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] The Raitch is OLD!


Today is Rachael's birthday! So, you know, head over there and flood her with comments and show her some serious love and hugs and stuff. She deserves it.

As far as I know, she's 21. She may be somewhere in her fifties or eighties, but thanks to all her good, clean living, she looks 21.

Anyway, Happy Birthday, Raitch! Have a great one, and let me know if you need bail money!


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/31/2008 09:36:00 AM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Happy Saturday!

First, here's your daily little peek into my mad world:


Neat, huh?

In other news, the weather here in the Land o' Cheese is absolutely amazing. Right now, at press time, the temperature is 67-degrees and the sun is shining. The only knock is that there's currently a wind out there that's strong enough to make ya wobble.

Still... I'll take it.

Unfortunately, I hurt. I woke up in a tangled mess of aches and pains, and right now I'm just waiting around for the Vicodin breakfast to kick in so I can, I don't know, do something. Fortunately, the Humira stabbing was yesterday, and I'm hoping that by later today or tomorrow it'll kick in, and I can run that marathon I've been wanting to do1.

I might even wash my Jeep. Of course, with a head full of Vicodin and a hose, I'm thinking a guy could have quite a lot of fun.

Well, I'm off to begin my mad and crazy day!


1 It should be pointed out that by marathon, I mean the many hazardous flights of stairs I traverse during the course of my day.

Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/31/2008 09:26:00 AM

Friday, May 30, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Photo for Phriday!

Here's what I'm thinking...


I really like how the flash handled the rain-soaked moss on this tree. Unfortunately, there's a lot of random crap in the background, and rather than move it, I'm hoping to get out tonight when it's nice and dark.

That is, of course, if it's not pouring rain. I mean, as fun as it is taking neat pictures and whatnots, standing around in a downpour with a bunch of reasonably pricey camera equipment isn't my idea of fun (unless, of course, it's some sort of late-night wet t-shirt contest).

Well, I've got to run. If I can get a decent shot out of this, I'll post it for all you to judge its worth and stuff.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/30/2008 02:25:00 PM

Thursday, May 29, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Picture....



I'm really swamped today, so here's an old one for you. Hope you enjoy.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/29/2008 02:40:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Et Tu?

I am amazed at the alacrity of the White House to completely disown Scott McClellan in light of the information contained in his book which details, quite clearly, the deceptions, dishonesty and machinations of the Bush Administration in the run-up to the folly that is the Iraq War.

First, Karl Rove mentioned that McClellan "sounds more like a Liberal blogger" than the usual boot-licking toady we've come to expect from White House press-secretaries.

The funny thing about Rove's comments is that, in all his bluster to discredit and attack McClellan, rather than address the information in McClellan's book, all Rove managed to accomplish is to point out that, all along, those Liberal bloggers were, in fact, right about Bush and his deceptions, and not the treasonous, anti-American folks these right-wing mouthpieces attempted to make them out to be.

Then, that smarmy, little whippet, Dana Perino rattled out some gibberish in attempt to cast some dispersions upon McClellan's sanity by pointing out that McClellan has obviously lost his mind and he is now, most certainly, not the Scott they've come to know and love.

The funny thing is, I highly doubt these lackeys of the Bush will ever understand the motivations behind McClellan's betrayal. After all, in order to understand why McClellan did what he did, Bush, and his corrupt and bungling crew, must first learn about and possess a conscience. Like McClellan, they must feel a shred of remorse for the near-infinite number of deceptions and moments of outright dishonesty, and that is something which Bush, in his infantile arrogance, will never feel. All you will ever see is more and more mock-bravado and silly posturing from a man who is more like a terrified, inept and incompetent child than the leader of the supposed free world.

The actions and statements of the White House with regards to McClellan should be seen as a metaphor for the entire Bush administration. A man tries to tell the truth. Yet, rather than embrace or address those truths, Bush and his cronies immediately, embarrassingly take steps to distance themselves from that truth. They resort to small, petty attacks rather than actually address what is being said.

The best part is that now our poor, betrayed Dubya will obviously be sitting alone on his porch rocking silently in his chair in the sad, little, lonely world abandoned by those who actually have some shred of integrity and human decency.



Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/29/2008 10:16:00 AM

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] At Least Donuts Have Quiet Holes.

Just a quick note.

I'm not going to ever visit a Dunkin' Donuts again, and it has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that I could stand to lose a few pounds.

You see, in a moment of supreme stupidity, the folks at Dunkin' Donuts caved to the irrelevant demands of that squeaky, little, radiowave-rodent Michelle Malkin and her irrelevant yelping about how an online ad featuring Rachael Ray somehow, in Malkin's empty little head, was supporting or encouraging or grabbing an AK-47 and actively participating in terrorism because of a paisley scarf (yes. A scarf. That's it).

Seriously. If Dunkin' Donuts, or any company for that matter, is so ridiculously weak as to collapse in the face of this bigoted, irrational shrew, the very last thing I'd ever wish to do is encourage them and these lunatics by giving them my money. If Dunkin' Donuts wishes to support hatred and bigotry, that's their choice, and my choice is to point and laugh at them for their backwards manner of thinking and doing business.

I'm not terribly worried about it though, and I'm sure the cowardly donut titans aren't either. For my fix, I've got a great bakery here in town, so the odds of me losing any weight are still pretty slim.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/28/2008 12:25:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Hmm... Needs Dusting.

Here ya go.

My Dusty Earth

I was futzing around with my flash off-camera. I s'pose I've got a ways to go before I start creating some cool strobist sort of stuff.

Well... I've got to wobble and wattle and bumble and stumble my way out of here.

See ya!


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/28/2008 11:58:00 AM

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Hello Tuesday!

For your enjoyment, here's a picture of the clouds that plowed through here yesterday, bringing a boatload of cold, cold air with them.

Here Comes Cold.

They were actually pretty awesome looking what with the setting sun and all. But, to put things into perspective, where I was standing, it was about 85-degrees, and on the ground behind those clouds, it was about 45-degrees with a wicked wind to boot.

Aside from that, I'm still feeling pretty peachy in spite of the odd weather. Some things are a little sore, but all-in-all, it's not too bad.

In fact, as it stands, the only glitch I'm dealing with today is the fact that the garbageman neglected to pick up my trash. Instead, rather than pick up the cans, he walked into his truck, grabbed a little orange sticker, checked the box indicating that the cans were beyond three-feet from the alleyway, and finally, with all the strength he could muster, walked four and a half feet to slap the little orange sticker on the can.


Of course, now I am thinking about getting out the yardstick and painting a nice, pink line on the concrete to indicate the appropriate "Pansy Zone" for my trash collector. And, as a bonus, perhaps I'll start sticking gym membership flyers on the cans as well. I mean, that last 18 inches isn't even uphill or anything.

Anyway, I hope your Tuesday is going swimmingly.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/27/2008 11:47:00 AM

Monday, May 26, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Weather Update.

Now, I don't need to explain the physics behind it since I'm sure you all know what happens when you heat something up and then cool it off quickly right?

Things have a way of going all asplody.

A short time ago, I'd say around 6 PM, the temperature here was in the mid-to-upper eighties. For Wisconsin in May, that was pretty freakin' weird. However, a short time later, at about 9 PM, the temperature had plummeted to around forty-five degrees.

Still... It was a great Memorial Day on this end, and I do sincerely hope yours was wonderful as well.

As for tomorrow, I don't know. From where I've been sitting, it seems as though the last six months or so have been etched and polished with a near-daily dose of one random pain after another, and for that, I do apologize. It's amazing how that sort of thing can just sap the spirit and serve no other purpose than to distract and annoy. And, unfortunately, there are many times throughout the day where it simply becomes too impossible to ignore, and then whatever I happen to be writing at the time just becomes a strange, disjointed mess of one meandering thought after another.

However, since I'm not really going out of my way to write for anyone other than myself, I'm kind of happy just purging the angst in whatever winding screed happens to find its way into my noggin at the moment I sit down and start clicking and clacking my way around (kind of like now, for example. I mean, there's really no point to this other than to just pass the time until I get sleepy enough to crash).

On the plus side, I'm actually feeling pretty great at the moment. In fact, at the moment, I'm feeling better than I have in about, oh... I'd say, the last six months. So, hopefully this is a sign that the combination of better weather and the weekly injections of Humira have started to spin things around for me.

Of course, I'm pragmatic enough to know that it's not a good idea to get my hopes up. After all, as anyone with a chronic health issue can tell you, about the only certainty is that, at some point, the rug will be yanked out from beneath you, and you will suddenly find yourself sitting flat on your ass, smack-dab in the middle of a really bad day. It's simply happened more times than I can count, and I'm certain it will happen more times than I care to imagine.

Still... I'm just enjoying the moment right now, and I do hope it lasts. But, most importantly, I hope you also enjoy those little but good moments whenever they find their way to you all.

Take care, and I'll see ya all tomorrow!


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/26/2008 10:49:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Greetings From Middle America...

Happy Memorial Day, one and all and everyone!

Memorial Day

I hope you all have a wonderful holiday today.

My plans are pretty simple and cliché. I'm sure there will be fire, and I'm sure there will be some sort of meat sizzling on the fire. But, I'll also be grilling a heap of veggies for the molar-grinding crowd that drops in. Hopefully, though, it will be a quiet day today.

So, that said, I am off, and I will see you all tomorrow.

Again, have a great one today.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/26/2008 10:21:00 AM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Lord, Won't You Buy Me a Mercedes Benz?

Leave it to a Christian to irrevocably nut-up a holiday created to honor and remember those who fought and gave their lives so as to keep alive the promise of our founders that our nation will remain free.
But did you know that 86% of Americans say they believe in God? Since we all know that 86 out of every 100 of us are Christians, who believe in God, we at Keiffe & Sons Ford wonder why we don't tell the other 14% to sit down and shut up. I guess maybe I just offended 14% of the people who are listening to this message. Well, if that is the case then I say that's tough, this is America folks, it's called free speech. None of us at Keiffe & Sons Ford are afraid to speak out. Keiffe & Sons Ford on Sierra Highway in Mojave and Rosamond, if we don't see you today, by the grace of God, we'll be here tomorrow.
Now, I am glad this little, irrational Christian bigot isn't afraid to speak out. It's good to exercise those rights now and then, after all. Unfortunately, in this man's prattling gibberish, he points out something very telling. And, that is that a whole heap of drooling Christian lunatics have this twisted, backwards notion that our nation employs some sort of "majority rule" with regards to the rights of its citizenry.

In other words, in this poor, odious bigot's mind, he believes that since there are more Christians than non-Christians in America (and don't even get me started on that forked-up logic. Not all people who believe in God are Christians), he is perfectly well within his rights to trample upon those of the minority. For example, since I am an atheist, I am also some sort of second-class citizen who should just "sit down and shut up."


Have a happy Memorial Day in your "Christian" America.


P.S. I, for one, am damn thankful for, and eternally indebted to, those who gave their lives so that I could do anything BUT sit down and shut up, Mr. Keiffe.

Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/26/2008 09:00:00 AM

Sunday, May 25, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Sunday's Picture is.... utter freakin' crap!

Sorry for the alliterative incoherence in the title, but not only do I think that, after a week, this whole "today's photo is..." meme has run its course and needs to be abandoned like a cold, dead, smelly flounder draped around one's neck, I also have to post a picture today which displays what I consider to be perhaps the planet's most unforgivable sin...

Worst...  beer...  ever!

Behold! It is the sin of buying cheap ass beer.

A while back, The Clone arrived on my doorstep lugging a thirty-pack of this madness in his arms, and since then, it has remained in my refrigerator mocking any and all who foolishly open the door to find this staring back at them. Like a cruel joke, it sits growing cold and inviting, but once opened and consumed, drinking a can of this is like having a wet mud brick embedded in your forehead with a sledgehammer.

In today's market, if a gallon of beer is less than a gallon of gas, trust me, you're better off getting your drink on at the local Citgo station by putting the nozzle in your mouth. Just remember not to smoke, and, apparently, keep the cell-phone calls to a minimum.

The ironic thing is that The Clone originally bought this alcoholic albatross as a joke for someone else's refrigerator; however, I'm reasonably certain that when he showed up on their doorstep all smiley and proud, he was greeted by the business end of a loaded shotgun and promptly told to take that nonsense with him elsewhere.

Unfortunately, I don't have a loaded gun. I do, however, have a sniveling Republican of an older brother with entitlement issues and a propensity to work himself into a frothy rage whenever the wind blows wrong. Every day --every single freakin' day-- he works his way into the house and into the little cave in the basement where I keep this burden. And, with all the elegance of a booze-addled robot, he opens the fridge, grumbles about the cheap ass beer, grabs a cheap ass beer, opens a cheap ass beer, and spends the next thirty minutes bitching about having to drink the cheap ass beer.

I admit, dear reader, in light of my brother's misery, there is a part of me that would like to replenish this nightmare once it's gone, but I really don't wish to give this beer's makers any ideas that their product is in any sort of demand. Perhaps if they sold it with the notion that it is a sort of bubbly, liquid gruel with little value to life other than to sustain one's need for alcohol, I'd know where I stood. Maybe they could slap a tidy slogan on the crate this crap comes in? It could say "Natural Ice! It may not get you a swimsuit model, but it'll piss off a Republican!"

There could be some appeal there, don't you think?


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/25/2008 10:42:00 AM

Saturday, May 24, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Saturday's Shot is Shy...

Or, maybe she's just tired of having her retinas baked from my flash.

Stop the Flash!

I never noticed before, but DeafCat does blend in kind of nicely with the color of the floors. And, don't worry, before you call the wailers at PETA, I'm not blasting my cats with the flash. The lighting is bounced off the ceiling and very indirect. In fact, I'd say that by the time it gets to her, it's no brighter than that half-dead incandescent flashlight that's hiding in the back of that drawer in your kitchen.

You might want to change the batteries in that, by the way.

Aside from that, how's everyone's Memorial Day weekend moving along? Is anyone doing anything fun and crazy and memorable?


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/24/2008 10:59:00 AM

Friday, May 23, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Friday's Foto is Fluffy.

Ah... yes. The DeafCat.

She's all about the stage...

I like this one; however, I really did screw up the Photoshopping on it. But, you know, they can't all be winners. I should be safe so long as the little diva furball doesn't see this picture.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/23/2008 11:38:00 AM

Thursday, May 22, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Thursday's Photo is... umm... Lemony!

I believe this picture truly pays homage to the Confucian oeuvre...


I'm not sure what, if anything, Confucius had to say about lemons. My humble opinion is that when life handed Confucius lemons, he probably skipped the lemonade and hit the vodka rather hard.

Then again, maybe that's just me doing a bit of projecting.



Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/22/2008 10:28:00 AM

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Wednesday's Photo is Lazy...

Nap time!

Lazy Tree

Doesn't it just make you want to lie down to stare up at the sky and enjoy the nice day? Maybe take a snooze on a lazy afternoon?

Well... Don't. This tree is in the front yard, and the surly old woman across the street likes to call the cops whenever someone sleeps in my front yard.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/21/2008 07:53:00 PM

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Tuesday's DeafCat is Wobbly.

Here's Tuesday's picture:


DeafCat doesn't do too well in the wind. Since she weighs next to nothing, she gets knocked around a lot, and if she's outside and things are a bit breezy, she'll wind up doing this odd sort of sniper-crawl back into the house. It's actually kind of fun.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/20/2008 08:57:00 AM

Monday, May 19, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] It's Called...


It's a
ridiculously simple concept. It's existence is one for which McCain should be buckled over in gratitude, as without diplomacy, his rotting carcass would still be penned up in Vietnam.

Unfortunately, Eddie Haskell John McCain is such a pandering, befuddled half-wit that he would rather devalue his fellow human beings to the point where he can sing happy little songs about the potential slaughter of thousands upon thousands of innocent victims for no other reason than the fact that he wants the votes of the war-mongering, maniacal, right-wing dickweeds.
McCain criticizes Obama for wanting Iran talks
By Steve Holland 20 minutes ago

CHICAGO (Reuters) - Republican presidential candidate John McCain accused Democratic front-runner Barack Obama on Monday of underestimating the threat posed by Iran and ridiculed his pledge to meet Iran's leader if elected.
(Full Story)

I have no problem with Obama wanting to act the adult and sit down to discuss, and hopefully somewhat dispel, the current acrimony which exists between America and Iran. I believe it could potentially save a great many lives, and for those who doubt the value of diplomacy, take a look at Iraq.

Rarely, has the world seen such a bungling, almost comical, diplomatic failure as a result of our inept and incompetent president's stupidity and chest-thumping, childish arrogance. It's embarrassing.

Unfortunately, the end result of that failure has yet to be seen. The numbers of burned, broken, bullet-riddled and dead American soldiers continues to grow in a war which had squat to do with anything other than the greed of a handful of people Americans were conned and terrorized into putting in charge.

So, really... I would rather have someone at least try to avoid yet another senseless war rather than barge in to destroy the population of Iran by belittling the lives of its citizens to the point where they are nothing more than fucking song lyrics. After the nightmare hellride of the Bush administration, America needs an adult for a leader, and despite his years, McCain is not an adult. McCain's a childish idiot imp who apparently will suck-off anyone with the right to vote.

Now, I know some gurgling, sound-byte-swallowing, neocon halfwit will carp on that Obama is an "appeaser." And, before you comment, or email, or whatever the hell you morons do to broadcast your gleaming stupidity, do yourselves a favor and learn what exactly constitutes appeasement and compare that to what is diplomacy. And, if you are still too rock stupid to comprehend the differences, then perhaps you should go French kiss a speeding freight train.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/19/2008 11:52:00 AM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Monday's Mower is Sleeeeepy...

Here's a picture for you:

You break it, you fix it...

Here we see The Clone repairing the lawnmower he conveniently broke. It's my belief that he broke it intentionally as an excuse to have a beer since, it's written into Milwaukee law that whenever small-engine repair is needed, beer must be readily available and easily accessed regardless of the time of day.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/19/2008 08:45:00 AM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Waiting and waiting...

I like Amazon, and various other email-order based internetty businesses. The prices are cheap, shipping's not too much of a raping, and, so far, the things I've ordered have arrived in one piece as opposed to receiving a box of jagged little shards which look nothing like the picture on the respective website (unless you're shopping from brokenstuff, or, of course).

Nonetheless, the one drawback to the whole shopping online experience is the waiting.

Right now, I am waiting for a camera flash I ordered from Amazon to arrive. I'm hoping it comes today, but from what I can guess, it'll probably be here tomorrow. Or the day after... or...

You get the picture.

I'm also waiting for a diffuser for the flash from Adorama; however, since I'm dumb and everything, that probably won't show up until Thursday.

Why am I dumb?

Well, though I absolutely love the store, and though it's highly probable I would easily sleep with anyone working there in exchange for some free camera goodies, Adorama has a somewhat wonky ordering policy which doesn't exactly mesh with my "Let's shop after 3PM on a Thursday" brand of rabid consumerism. You see, they shut down their order-filling internets at that time, and though you can still order, that order isn't going to be filled until Monday.

I've done this three times so far, and each time, I tell myself that I am going to buy on a Wednesday. However, somewhere in my warped and giddy "Ooo... I'm buying an internet" mind, I see their shiny things, and that Thursday or Friday turns into a Monday or a Tuesday, and I inevitably kick myself for not ordering earlier (trust me, people! This makes sense somewhere in my brain).

In other words, it's more waiting... Ugh...

Of course, all that pales in comparison to the wireless flash triggers I ordered from Hong Kong. I placed that order, and the next day, Southeast Asia get smacked by typhoons, earthquakes, hurricanes, and Godzilla. So, I'm thinking that air-mail to Wisconsin probably isn't exactly at the top of their list. So, the odds of that showing up before July, I'm thinking, are pretty slim.

The thing is, it's all so convenient. Unfortunately, this whole waitingthing is seriously cutting into the time I could be spending growing bored with my toys.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/19/2008 08:04:00 AM

Sunday, May 18, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Sorry Ladies...

I know... I should post a picture of a flower or something wildly pretty, and I've got hundreds upon hundreds of flower pictures, but, to be perfectly honest, I'm bored with flower pictures. So, you'll have to settle for this...

Waves at Night

It's still pretty, in my opinion. This is my first attempt at a very long exposure, and the clouds were moving pretty fast across the sky. Still, as cool as the clouds look at night, the maple tree in front of the house looks really cool with the streetlight lighting it up.

Anywho, the picture was taken on Friday night, and I'm writing this on Saturday and setting it to post on Sunday. See? That's the whole weekend.



Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/18/2008 09:00:00 AM

Saturday, May 17, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] A Shot for Saturday.

Hello world. Having a fun weekend?

Here's a peek into my world...


Fancy? No.

Okay... I'm back to being a bum. I hope your weekend is wicked wild and fun.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/17/2008 12:31:00 PM

Friday, May 16, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] It's a Friday!

Alright... Everyone is demanding that I stop posting and get some much-needed rest. And, well, that's the plan. I'm trying to keep this brain of mine in neutral as much as possible. In fact, I've not read a single news-feed in several days, and you know what?

It's freakin' refreshing. After all, if I have no idea what's going on, there's really no way I can get ticked off about it.

Anyway, I'm not going to be around this weekend. I may post a picture or two since I'm getting some new toys for my camera in the mail, but I can't make any promises.

So, before I shut up shop for the weekend, here's a picture for your Friday:


I kind of like the black and white on this. I hope you do too.

Have a great weekend one and all and everyone in between. As always, please feel free to share whatever plans and antics you may have.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/16/2008 01:11:00 PM

Thursday, May 15, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Munchies Redux.

Here's what the picture in the previous entry should look like:


Much better, methinks...


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/15/2008 07:04:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Munchies

Originally uploaded by DPoem
Blah... blah... blah...

Just testing Flickr's "Blog this" feature for kicks, giggles, and, most importantly, to help me sleep at night.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/15/2008 06:33:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] It's Still There...

Makes you want to start howling, doesn't it?

Moon Stuff.

Well, go ahead. In fact, the next time you find yourself in a crowded spot, just howl your heads off. It's a great conversation starter (works for job interviews as well).


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/15/2008 11:08:00 AM

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Picture...

Yes. I'm on a blogging break, but I'm still going to do my best to post a picture a day.

The Sweeper

Ooo... It's all dark and artsy, huh? Shadows are nifty things.

Hey! If you got any neat shadow shots, leave a link in the comments, and I'll check 'em out.

Now, I'm off to be broken... or breaking? On break?

Slow! I'm off to be slow! Yay, slow!


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/14/2008 06:45:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] A Conversation...

"I'm not voting for Barack Hussein Obama," my redneck brother said, making sure to emphasize Obama's middle name in a sort of weird condemnation of the man.
"Yeah, well," I fumbled, caught off-guard by such gleaming inanity, and I finally muttered angrily, "John McCain has the same shoe size as Adolf Hitler."
"What does that have to do with anything?" He asked.

Fortunately, I can avoid my brother, for the most part.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/14/2008 02:10:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Hello World!

Hi Earth.

It's been a while since last we spoke. I hope everything is well and wonderful on your end. How's the kids? Is work going okay for you?

Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that I am stoned off my gourd at the moment.

Yeah. It's one of those days where I woke up feeling as though I spent the night in a spinning cement mixer filled with bowling balls (thankfully, I must have been wearing a helmet since my head is pretty much the only thing that doesn't hurt. So, at least I was smart at some point. Hooray me!).

Still... I think I need a break. I could use some time off to reorganize my thoughts, ideas and sundry notions. After all, right now, the only thing going through my blurry mind is the word "ouch," and my rather ubiquitous, yet gap-filled, plan to rule the world (I've decided to use kittens instead of bombs. And, I figure if we start by unloading enough kittens on that sandbox in the Middle East, well... I don't need to tell you how cats are genetically predisposed to the destruction of sandboxes, do I?).

But, I digress (yowza! I'm good at wandering off track, aren't I?)...

The thing is, Earth, Holly was saying something about everyone being on a blogging break, of sorts, and well... The idea seemed like a good one to me. So, Earth? If you, as a planet, are upset by this, I suggest you blame her.

It's okay. She can take it. Holly's a people person, after all.

So, that said, I'll see you later, Earth. You can keep up with what I'm looking at by checking out my Flickr photostream, but even that's going to be a little slow. And, don't worry. I'll be back when I'm feeling a little better.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/14/2008 10:43:00 AM

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Tuesday... Something...

My chives have betrayed me...


As you can see, they've begun to go to seed in the middle of May! Some of the trees around here have yet to get leaves on them, and here these weak, pitiful things are already going to bloom.

There's something so remarkably unfair about all of that.

Aside from that babble, I like this picture because it really stretches the capabilities of this small, but wildly wonderful little 50mm lens of mine. The depth of field is mind-blowing (look at all those blurry bits). Really. I'm just stunned that something that costs about $100 could be so sharp.

In other news, I'm kind of once again having a somewhat rough and achy day today, but I'll try to write more about that a little later in the week. But, no need to bother yourselves about that now.

Have a great day everyone!


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/13/2008 02:48:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Kind of Quiet Laughter...

Now, here's a guy with a strangely cool job:

He tickles rats.

I think the really cool thing is how, at the end, the rat seeks out the guy's fingers to be tickled again with no intention of biting him. Who knew rats were ticklish?

Still, for all you sewer-workers out there, I don't really recommend you try to tickle the rats you find on your job. However, you could start off with a joke or two just to see how things play out. I think rats like jokes about cats and lawyers (everyone loves a good lawyer joke, right?).

(Thanks BoingBoing)

Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/13/2008 08:54:00 AM

Monday, May 12, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Monday's Picture!

Yes. Confucius took a bath (technically, he fell into the sink), so for today's photo, here he is with a powdered donut on his head:


I think he looks kind of happy. And, really, let's face it; everyone needs a donut on their head at one point or another.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/12/2008 10:12:00 AM

Sunday, May 11, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] For The Moms...

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there.

Mother's Day

Here's hoping that the mothers who drop by here find themselves having a wonderful and relaxing day.



Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/11/2008 07:43:00 AM

Saturday, May 10, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Too Many Candles!


I just found out that today, May... umm.. 10th, is Scalzi's 39th birthday, and I think everyone should head over to The Whatever to wish him a happy-happy.

Now, after muddling through the age of 39 for close to a year now, I think I can safely say that I am somewhat qualified to speak on this matter. It's not as bad as it sounds. Yes. Turning 39 does have some similarities to certain root canal procedures, and there is often the overwhelming urge to lie and tell people you're actually 25. But, really, so long as you keep your dishonesty to supermodels, and once you learn to embrace your encroaching middle age, life can be a hell of a lot of fun.

So, Scalzi? Eat some cake. Hug the wife and child. Then, at some point in the afternoon, take that economic stimulus check that's burning a hole in your little mittens, and go pick up that shiny red Mustang you've got your eye on.

Happy Birthday!



Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/10/2008 08:05:00 AM

Friday, May 9, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Randomly Out!

Hi. This is Dan. I'm not on the blog today, so leave a message after the beep, and I'll try to get back to you...

I just spent the last several hours at the doc's office with two knees, a couple of ankles, and all my fingers and toes growing increasingly more painful with each and every breath. It was annoying, and by the time the doctor (coolest doctor in the world, mind you), got around to seeing me, my first request was to demand that I be repeatedly smashed in the face with a morphine-coated brick.

Instead, he prescribed Vicodin with a tranquilizer side-car, and told me to come back in a month. "If things don't improve," he said, "we'll get you that morphine coated brick."

I love my doctor.

Aside from that, once my whimperfest was finished, he and I discussed medical shows on TV. He agreed that shows such as House and ER, although fun to watch, were utter bunk when it comes to representing the real world of medicine. Surprisingly, in his opinion, the show Scrubs is, however, remarkably accurate.

Unfortunately, there was no Sarah Chalke in my doctor's office. If she was there, I think I'd be sick all the freakin' time!

Anyway, we rattled on and both marveled at the unbearable, insurmountable mountain of steaming suck that was the Scrubs' season (series?) finale, and I peed in a cup, gave a singing phlebotomist a half-gallon of blood, and dragged my aching self back home with my bottles of new pills.

So, needless to say, right now, I'm just sort of sitting and waiting for the Vicodin to start working (and, it is! I can feel my toes getting warm, and fuck me silly if that doesn't feel better than being scraped off a freeway and nursed back to health by a busload of whiskey-toting Sarah Chalkes!). Nonetheless, however, I think it's in everyone's best interests that I stop typing, eat a sandwich and just stare at my friendly little idiot box.

In other words, I am off! And, I'll see you tomorrow. However, as always, do feel free to share your weekend plans.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/09/2008 03:21:00 PM

Thursday, May 8, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Thursday Falls...

Yes. I know. I am a little late in getting today's picture up. In my defense, I am not feeling all that wonderful with the usual aches, pains and energy-sucking inflammations. So, I've been in bed most of the day.

On the plus side, I see my doctor tomorrow, so maybe he'll figure out a way to make things somewhat better.

Anyway, it's an older photo (haven't had time to get out and shoot pictures either), but I hope you enjoy it.

I Love the Bokeh in This...
Okay... I'm off. Hope you all had a great day and are gearing up for a great evening.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/08/2008 03:26:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] The Most Amazing Thing You'll See This Week.

Take a look at this series of pictures of a thunderstorm sharing some screen time with the erupting volcano, Chaitén, in Chile.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/08/2008 09:19:00 AM

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] A Fluffy Sort of Wednesday...

Hi folks!

Life on this end is a bit of a painful mess at the moment, and I'm kind of more in the mood to just drool at something than put in any effort with this blog thing. It's not that I don't love this blogging thing. I do. It's fun, and I have some great discussions with some of the world's most fascinating and unique people ever.

The thing is, I'm just too sore and thumped on pain killers to do anything other than post today's picture and wobble back to bed to plow my eyes across the pages of whatever good book I can find to read.

So, here's today's photo:

It's DeafCat looking out upon a rainy day. Unlike DogCat, she's not all that fond of rain. In fact, she treats rain as a cat is expected to. In her mind, the rain might as well be muddy, little drops of boiling-hot battery acid falling upon her Just Cleaned Fur!â„¢.

DogCat, on the other hand, is decidedly un-catlike in that, when it starts raining, he will leap out the door and dive into a puddle in mad pursuit of a drowning earthworm who just happened to be twitching rather disrespectfully in his general direction.

The only problem with DeafCat is that I don't really think that she makes the connection that what she sees out the window on the door is actually what is on the other side of the door. In other words, to her, the window is like a big TV with crappy sound and a lousy picture which just happens to be located on the only portal to the outside world. So, whenever I show up, she will wail and bellow and beg to be let outside in spite of the fact that window/television shows that it's pouring out.

And, every time, I open the door, she tries to take a step forward, and inevitably, she will look up to me with her most feeble look as if to say Dude? WTF? I got some of that on me? I just spent six hours washing this paw, and look what you did? You will pay, human!



PostedBy Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/07/2008 11:38:00 AM

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Tuesday DogCat.

What can I say about this?

Appreciate the Warmth...

Really. After the hellish nightmare of a winter we suffered through this year in the upper Midwest, when I step outside in the morning to find DogCat greeting the sun in such a way as this, I'm kind of envious. Don't get me wrong. I appreciate the warming, but I don't think there's any way whatsoever that I could ever soak it up in such a way as he has done here.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/06/2008 10:54:00 AM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] And, The Winner is...

It's yet another busy day here, and I suppose that's a good thing. Unfortunately, I don't have a whole heck of a lot of time to spend here, but, as promised, here is the new and improved, well-titled photo of mine:

Silent Walk

I went with SendFlowers2Me's title of "Silent Walk." And, if you decide to poke around in the picture's EXIF Data, you'll see that this photo is not just mine, but hers as well. So, if it winds up as a calendar hanging in a kitchen in Des Moines, Iowa, it will say that this photo belongs to

No. It's not much, but I think it's funny.

Anyway, I picked the title because it just seemed to fit in a very odd way.

You see, the picture is that of a rocking chair out on my patio and not that of a deck or walkway as the title would suggest. The notion of just sitting and rocking while letting one's mind wander as the world spins just seemed to wedge itself into what I would define as a silent sort of walk.

Nonetheless, I like the title, and I hope you all do too.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/06/2008 08:45:00 AM

Monday, May 5, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Sigh....

Teh Stoopid? It's spell-binding!
Land 'O Lakes, Florida -- The stories in the news about inappropriate relationships between teachers and students have been overwhelming. There was even a substitute teacher in New Port Richey who got in trouble after investigators say she had a relationship with an underage student.

Well, another Pasco County substitute teacher's job is on the line, but this time it's because of a magic trick.

The charge from the school district — Wizardry!
(full story)

When it comes to the United States, Florida is pretty much the drunk uncle no one likes to talk about. After all, there's a pretty good reason why it's got its own category on Fark.

Anyway, I move that Floridians demand that the bustling hive of occultism in Orlando --often referred to with the rather malevolent appellation: "Magic Kingdom"-- be shut down as soon as humanly --nay Godly!-- possible. Finally, my dreams of witnessing the immolation of that troublesome rodent may come true! After all, sorcery is a far worse crime than simple wizardry, and though he may yet be but a lowly apprentice, Mickey's corruption of our children can not be ignored!

I suppose Goofy's safe since this isn't Texas.

Still... Firing a teacher for "wizardry?!?" In the 21st Century?!? In America?!? It boggles the mind, it does.

Stay stupid, Flori-duh!


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/05/2008 04:03:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] The Daily-Daily...

Say hello to Fat Bastard...

Fat Bastard

This squirrel, whose mouth is always full of something, has been wobbling his corpulence from one end of the yard to the other over the past couple of days. Aside from that, the only other exercise he's been getting is to try and scratch loose whatever underfed louse, flea or tick has foolishly found its way onto his hide only to find an impenetrable layer of blubber rather than a source of nutrients.

I figure that by the end of the month, I will probably be able to hear this round little rodent's nose whistling from the boughs and branches above me as his breathing becomes as labored as that of a fat man on a flight of stairs.

He's a cute little butterball, though. He just doesn't really move too quickly. But, obviously, he's well fed (I don't know how since I'm not giving him anything).


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/05/2008 12:07:00 PM

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Still Sunday...

And, AOL's still broken.  Anyway, enjoy this (I hope).

It's still Sunday here, and I wanted to throw this shot up because, well, I'm kind of proud at how it turned out, and the last picture was kind of a cop-out.


I think with the colors and the light, the whole thing looks almost too perfect to be real. It's actually kind of striking (this was taken in natural light too. No flash).

Now, I've got to crash. Tomorrow is going to be a nightmare of a Monday, and I am certainly not looking forward to it. Of course, this means absolutely nothing to you other than the fact that you might actually get a bit of work done since you're not subjecting yourself to my tedious ramblings.

On the other hand, if you do need the distraction, the Friday Photo Contest thingy is still open, and I'll be picking and posting the winner on Tuesday. So, put your mind to it, come up with a title, and, most importantly, have fun folks!


Hey! Potatohead!

It would seem that AOL has taken to screwing the pooch with an almost religious frequency. 

What this means for you, dear readers, is that you are probably not going to be seeing many entries here in the future.  Normally, when I post on my Blogger blog, the entry gets shipped via email and posted here.  Unfortunately, for whatever capricious reason, AOL has taken it upon themselves to block that email, and well...  I just don't care enough to go out of my way in getting it fixed. 

What I do care about is the fact that AOL has also taken it upon themselves to delete the emails sent to me whenever someone comments on my blog.  In other words, if you comment on my Blogger blog, I'm not going to know about it because AOL won't let those emails be delivered.

Anyway, if you do enjoy reading this journal on AOL, I don't really know what to tell you.  Maybe AOL will fix it, but I wouldn't hold my breath.  Fortunately, I have open comments on my Blogger blog. 

Unfortunately, AOL is blocking the email of those comments so I have no way of knowing they even exist. 

Personally, with this journal, I'm kind of embarrassed to be associated with AOL these days.  They seem more interested in driving people insane with their incompetence than they do with actually putting together a stable product that functions with any consistency for any length of time. 

Nonetheless, I leave this entirely up to AOL.  If entries show up here, fine.  If not, I really don't care. 


Sunday's Picture...

It's Sunday, so, by law, I've got to post something pretty for the pretty ladies out there who pretty up the world.

Another Heart

Yep. The little heart-shaped leaf is still hanging on the side of the house. So, I snapped a picture and colorized it a bit. I recommend looking at the large version of this.

Anyway, I'm off to grumble at the houseplants. You know how it is --bad mood and all.


Saturday, May 3, 2008

Saturday Night...

I freakin' love this song.

Right now, I've got it and the whole Astronauts & Heretics CD blowing the ever living hell out of my speakers.

I don't know why, but this song has wedged itself into the soundtrack of my life, and some of the best times (as well as a few of the worst) have found me with this melody just running itself into infinity on whatever cd player was handy. And, when one wasn't anywhere nearby, that freakin' piano was always in my head. The way it seems to just dance above the song has always hooked me. It tickles something deep inside and fills me with a weird, hard-to-approach sort of inspiration.

I think it's one of those sorts of things where you don't know whether to get up and dance or to just sit and enjoy. If there was a way to do both, life would be much, much easier, wouldn't it?

Anyway, in case you're curious, Thomas Dolby's got a blog. It's kind of fun to read.

Enjoy the video.


Saturday's Picture...

Apparently, AOL's comically capricious mobile-blogging feature is borked.  So, sorry this one's late.  I'd explain, but what's the point? 

'ere ya go:

Looks Like a Horse to Me...  Or, a goat?  Maybe a dog...

I think it looks like an animal cracker.


Friday, May 2, 2008

Friday's Picture...

I'm honestly not sure what to think of today's picture, and I could use your help.


I figure I'll let you all contemplate it and its artistic worth. I personally like the combination of light and dark, and I really get a kick out of how the little circle is split in two.

The thing is, I can't think of a nice, artsy-fartsy title for this image. So, I think from now on, every Friday, I will post a picture whose name I just can't figure out. Then, over the course of the weekend, I will let you, my readers, come up with a title which you can leave in the comment section of either my Blogger blog or my AOL Journal.

On Monday or Tuesday (I haven't decided yet), I'll pick one and go to the Flickr page for the photo and put your title on there and give you credit along with a link to your blog or journal or whatever (if you've got one).

Now, don't ask what criteria I'm using to decide the "best" title. It incorporates an algorithm based on elements pulled from ancient Chinese mathematics, tidal charts for the South Pacific, and my mood at the time. In other words, whatever!

So, have fun, pick a title, enter as often as you'd like, tell your friends, and let's see what we can come up with, shall we?


Thursday, May 1, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Ha!

For today's picture, I went with a fortune cookie I received recently while getting my fix of Shrimp Curry-Fried Rice.

Fortune Cookie.

Yeah... I could go on about this, but there's not much of a point, really. I will say that as far as prophecies go, this one's kind of weak. After all, currently, with how I'm feeling today, in order to settle down happily, I'd probably have to take up a steady diet of heroin and whiskey.


Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/01/2008 03:53:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Bad Moods...


I'm in a dreadful mood today. I think it has to do with the fact that everything hurts (as usual), and I am just beat.

I think that's one of the things about living with the constant bite of chronic pain. It's not so much that things hurt. It's the fact that things just don't ever stop hurting. It wears a person out and runs them down, and no amount of coffee can give me the energy I need to trudge through my day while silently hoping that either later in the day, or tomorrow, will be a better day.

The thing is, I'm not tired. Not in the least. I have absolutely no desire to sleep or anything. But, when I dragged my inflamed carcass out of bed this morning, I took the usual inventory of aches, and before my foot found its place in my slipper, there was an col, iron anvil placed upon my shoulders, and I knew that anything I would try doing today would be made more slow difficult by this crushing dead weight of constant pain.

Even reading a book is a chore as, rather than actually concentrating on what's printed before me, my mind sits there chattering like an obnoxious toddler saying Hey! Hey! This hurts. Hey! This hurts! Hey! Hey! This is hurting! Hey! This... ad infinitum.

On the plus side, tomorrow is supposed to be a better day weatherwise. And, I'm hoping that things will improve accordingly.

Right now, however, the bits of my shoulders are grinding together with a sickening cacophony of bone scraping against bone, and the joints are popping with a stomach-churning wet slurp as things just try to find some comfortable equilibrium.

So, I'm off.

I do hope you all manage to enjoy your internets today without me.


Hey! To help you enjoy your internets today, I strongly recommend you go and check out Rachel's latest poem. She seems to have found inspiration in a picture I took, and I am very flattered that someone with such talent would take a simple photo of mine and add something to make it astounding and more beautiful than I originally pictured.

Thanks, Raitch! I'm both flattered and honored to see my picture placed beside your beautiful words.

Ya rawk!!!1!one!!

Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/01/2008 10:29:00 AM