Saturday, March 29, 2008

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] And Now, The News...

It's Saturday, and it appears to be a really slow news day. I suppose that's a good thing. Sure, there are the usual ongoing stories about war, bombs, money, and America's next president, but there are also other things going on.

For example, do you remember the doomsday cult that holed up in a Russian cave to await the end of the world in May?

They're still there.

They spent the entire freakin' winter in a cave in Russia. And, here I was complaining about my own personal hell that is winter in Wisconsin. I hope none of them read this silly blog. I mean, that would be like complaining about a stiff neck to a person who's just had his head cut off.

Then again, I did have to shovel.

Anyway, stay tough you cave-dwelling cultists! I can't tell you how happy I am that the world is going to end in May. My birthday is in June, after all, and here I was all worried and bummed out about turning forty. So, you know, it's just nice that I don't have to shoulder that particular burden anymore.

Aside from that, the damned French are going to create a black hole that will consume the earth. And no. Girard Depardieu doesn't have a new movie coming out. This is actually a major concern for two guys in Hawaii (not far from France or Switzerland at all) who decided to sue to stop the experiments at CERN.

Maybe the cave-dwelling cult people are on to something?

I guess I'd better eat my birthday cake now, eh?

And, finally, George Bush is still trying to fix America's crumbling economy. And, as is the usual course for Dubya, all he's got are soothing words rather than anyone with any actual knowledge around him who could maybe come up with a genuine idea.

Imagine, if you will, driving your spankin' new BMW through the Alabama backwater only to have the engine in your Beemer make a few serious clunks and finally just stop working altogether.

You call the tow truck, you go to the garage, and some slack-jawed, grease-coated oaf named Cletus tells you that he can fix your BMW.

That's pretty much where America stands with George Bush trying to fix the economy.

"It's gonna take 'bout two weeks!"



Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 3/29/2008 08:33:00 AM


  1. ...oof ... I have a stomach ache ...

    ... your Bush story was dead on ... unfortunately ... is McCain going to be any worse ..?  I say that, because the Democratic Party is bent on self distruction ...

  2. You lot are up shit creek without a paddle. Only thing is where you go we go.......... What a pila shyte!