Meme madness.

    Here's a meme I swiped from Dawn.  It seems like the perfect day for that sort of thing since I'm still in lazy-mode. 

    Anyway, please feel free to swipe it if you wish.  And, if you do, leave a comment either here or in Dawn's Blog to show us your handiwork.

    Enjoy! 
     
What curse word do you use the most?
    I'm going to have to say "shit!"  I seem to have been saying that a lot lately, and I don't see that clearing up any time soon. 
 
What time is your alarm clock set to?

    Four in the bloody morning.  It's usually when I wake up and get to making coffee before I plop down to start writing. 

Do you remember where you were on 9/11/01?

    I was sitting in my office here at home watching the morning news and typing a story that would never be important again.  I may revisit it sometime in the distant future, but I don't know. 

Would you rather take the picture or be in the picture?
   
    If it's a mug shot, I'd rather be the one taking the picture.  Any others, well...  I don't mind one way or the other. 

What was the last movie you watched?
   
    Yesterday evening, I watched Daredevil since it was pretty much the only thing on TV and Jennifer Garner is smokin' hot. 

Do you ever take medication to help you fall asleep?

    Yes.  Lots.  Sometimes I mix it with bourbon. 

    Actually, in all honesty, I just take the occasional pain killer not so much to help me fall asleep, but to mostly help me stay asleep. 

Has anyone told you a secret this week?

    The ex-girlfriend/girlfriend ad infinitum told me that she loves me, but that's not too much of a secret unless you're either her ex-husband or mother. 

When was the last time you had Starbucks?

    Monday, February 17th, 2003 at 3:00 pm.  Their coffee tasted not entirely unlike an ashtray that's been filled with the urine of a long-extinct species of tropical llama.  I make much better coffee at home. 

Can you whistle?

    Yes.  I am fluent in all forms of whistling. 

Did you watch cartoons as a child?

    We watched cartoons during those precious few moments where we weren't being chased around the house by our knife-wielding drunken, screaming mother. 

What will you be doing in one hour?

    Probably hitting save on this meme.

What was the last song you heard?

    KT Tunstall's "Suddenly I See."  I'm trying to learn it for a party where I'll be making an ass out of myself with a friend's band next weekend.

Last time you cried?

    On the Fourth of July.  It wasn't so much the patriotism or the fireworks, but I dropped a bottle of Pilsner Urqel, and it shattered on the patio out back.  Someone has to weep for the fallen.
 
What’s the weather like?
   
    It's like summer, and if this keeps up, I may actually feel safe taking the ice-scraper out of my car.

What did you do before this?

    I thought about eating some Jello (strawberry), but I fed the cats instead. 

When is the last time you slept on the floor?

    It was the last time I mixed bourbon and pain-killers.  I dreamt of pasta and woke up with half an extension cord in my mouth. 

Do you eat breakfast daily?

    Yes.  But only on those days when I am hungry around breakfast time. 

What did you do last night?

    I slept. 

Do you use sarcasm?

    Never.  Why would I use sarcasm?  You might as well ask "do you use air?"

How old will you be turning on your next birthday?

    I will turn old. 

Areyou picky about spelling and grammar?

    I am sometime, butt, it depends on the situation.  I can usualy figure out what your trying to say. 

Have you ever been to Six Flags?

    I have.  I've been there many times, but not since they started naming rollercoasters after superheroes. 

Do you watch the news?

    Too much sometimes.  The news tends to make me angry these days.

How did you get one of your scars?

     I was hit by an airplane when I was five, and I wound up with a huge gash on the tip of my middle finger. 

Who was the last person to make you mad?

    These days, it's just been a steady stream of George Bush.

What is the last thing you purchased?

    A cheeseburger.

What side of the heart do you draw first?

    The right ventricle. 

Can you dive without plugging your nose?

    Yes.  Do people really plug their noses when they dive?

What color is your shaving razor?

    It's the color of dried blood.

What is your blood-type?

    I'll have to check my razor, but until then, I'm going to say it's mostly cholesterol and merlot.

Who would you want to be tied to for 24 hours?

    Someone with a sharp knife.

How do you feel about carrots?

    They make good weapons.

How many chairs at the dining room table?

    I have a dining room table?

Do you know what time it is?

    Yes, I do. 

Do you know all the words to the Fresh Prince Theme Song?

    I would hang myself if I did. 

What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator?

    I would start making out with the first woman I could find.  If I am alone in the stuck elevator, I would stand in front of the doors and pretend I'm the dictator of a very small and boxy empire with Musak for my national anthem. 

What’s your favorite kind of gum?

    I don't like gum. 

Do you know which US states don’t use Daylight Savings Time?

    No.  But, I think they are all a bunch of lucky bastards.

What’s something you’ve always wanted?

    A death-ray and a case of martian whiskey. 

Do you have hairy LEGS?

    Yes.  I think my LEGS! are quite hairy.  Granted, the hair on my LEGS! is not long enough to braid, but it's getting there. 

Would you rather swim in the ocean or a lake?

    In the ocean, with hungry sharks and a friend who bleeds a lot.

Describe your hair:

    Picture a lot of very scrawny rats jumping off a sinking ship.

Do you have a tan?

    Hell yeah.  I once had a Pakistani gas-station clerk ask me to translate something for him. 

Are you a television addict?

    Only when there's no heroin available.

Do you enjoy spending time with your mother?

    Not since she got the laser sight for her Glock.

Are you a sugar freak?

    I don't think so.  

Do you like orange juice?

    It works nicely with vodka.

What sign are you?

    Pedestrian crossing.


-DP