[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Randomly Out!

Hi. This is Dan. I'm not on the blog today, so leave a message after the beep, and I'll try to get back to you...

I just spent the last several hours at the doc's office with two knees, a couple of ankles, and all my fingers and toes growing increasingly more painful with each and every breath. It was annoying, and by the time the doctor (coolest doctor in the world, mind you), got around to seeing me, my first request was to demand that I be repeatedly smashed in the face with a morphine-coated brick.

Instead, he prescribed Vicodin with a tranquilizer side-car, and told me to come back in a month. "If things don't improve," he said, "we'll get you that morphine coated brick."

I love my doctor.

Aside from that, once my whimperfest was finished, he and I discussed medical shows on TV. He agreed that shows such as House and ER, although fun to watch, were utter bunk when it comes to representing the real world of medicine. Surprisingly, in his opinion, the show Scrubs is, however, remarkably accurate.

Unfortunately, there was no Sarah Chalke in my doctor's office. If she was there, I think I'd be sick all the freakin' time!

Anyway, we rattled on and both marveled at the unbearable, insurmountable mountain of steaming suck that was the Scrubs' season (series?) finale, and I peed in a cup, gave a singing phlebotomist a half-gallon of blood, and dragged my aching self back home with my bottles of new pills.

So, needless to say, right now, I'm just sort of sitting and waiting for the Vicodin to start working (and, it is! I can feel my toes getting warm, and fuck me silly if that doesn't feel better than being scraped off a freeway and nursed back to health by a busload of whiskey-toting Sarah Chalkes!). Nonetheless, however, I think it's in everyone's best interests that I stop typing, eat a sandwich and just stare at my friendly little idiot box.

In other words, I am off! And, I'll see you tomorrow. However, as always, do feel free to share your weekend plans.

-Beep!

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Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 5/09/2008 03:21:00 PM