Friday, May 19, 2006

An Odd Thing, Indeed.


    Now, I've got a lot of junk in my house, and I'm certain if you looked hard enough, you may even find the Holy Grail mixed in with my collection of coffee cups, beer steins, and other trinkets which have fallen into my pockets during my travels.

    Anyway, for this Weekend Assignment, John Scalzi wanted to know what we have in our houses that other people probably don't.  I don't know about you, but on this end, you literally can't swing a cat in this house without hitting something that just doesn't belong.  I live in an abnormal world.

    I had a hard time deciding on what to throw in here.  I've got bricks from the Roman Aquaduct that "fell into my pocket" during a trip to Trier, Germany.  I've got a man from a foosball table on a shelf in my kitchen.  Heck!  I've even got a gong in my dining room.    

    On the other hand, all that is simply kitch compared to the display of petrified porcine glory that I have in the living room. 

    Yes folks!  It is a concrete pig.  And, it is a damn heavy one at that.  In fact, I'd estimate it to be well over one-hundred pounds.  I think it's kind of cool, and I've given it many names from Rudy to Wilbur; however, I've never quite been able to settle on one particular affectation for my porky little chum. 

    Not only is this thing a great conversation starter, but one of the perks to having this beast in the house is that I can move it around and freak out the cats.  For example, the last time I moved it into the middle of the room, my deaf and mostly blind cat spent about an hour hissing and swatting at the poor piece of stone before she realized it wasn't a threat.

    Originally, I had wanted to put the thing in the yard.  In fact, I wanted to get another one and put them on opposite sides of the front steps.  I mean, some people have lions guarding their stately manors.  I can have pigs. 

oink oink!




  1. Well now.. that's interesting.. and true i doubt many others have a cement pig.  I know I don't!

    When I was living in CA i did volunteer work for Tippi Hedren's Shambala Preserve.. she had a real, live potbelly pig running around in her house.. he had a good name.."Sir Winston Churchill".. you may have heard of him? !  lol..

  2. As I'm quite certain your STONE PIG won't find it's way onto the pages of one of those home decorating magazines as the latest 'must have' items.(mind you, I am in NO way trying to diminish the undeniable asthetic value of your beautiful STONE PIG.My sarcasm is a veiled attemt to distract from the fact that I'm just jealous.)You may very well be the only person with a STONE PIG (actually,years ago I DID once have a STONE cock---I mean ROOSTER in my apartment - really!)BUT--------I'm gonna guess you wouldn't be the only person with a STONED PIG living under your roof!!!BADUMDUM!!!Not like I do or anything-I mean-I DON'T! REALLY.I swear!But I'm just saying-you know- UH-STONE PIG-and STONED PIG? Like a joke.YOU know???Anyways-your pig is beautiful and I think it's a MARVELOUS idea to get another piglet for the enjoyment of anyone walking past or onto your property. Our neighbors next door to us here in Bensonhurst,Brooklyn have those lions you spoke of.Sadly, I gotta get some batteries for my camera otherwise I could show you right now.Not to far from here there's an otherwise unspectacular house with astroturf on their porch beautifully lit by a most extravagant crystal chandalier.Really.I heard they own a pizzaria.It's a pretty fancy chandalier.I'm gonna guess they sell a lot a slices.YOU know-of pizza.Did I mention I live in BENSONHURST?Anyways-I digress.Let me hop on my bicycle and ride to 86th ST. and get those batteries.And you say YOU have a distracted mind?My ADHD is really actin' up today.Some got bunions-I'm so poor I can't pay attention.Anyways, you wise,distracted man,you,LUV the PIG!-ciao!-MYRTLE C.

  3. stubbing your toe on that thing wandering in the house after a night of drinking would definitely suck.
    He can come over for a play date with my cement frog anytime...

  4. Two of them at the entrance of your humble domicle could indicate that you might be a redneck. I can say this because I'm from Georgia.


  5. Dan. I think a pair of pigs and a doormate that makes a GRUNT sound when you step on it would make a wonderful welcome to your home, though it might scare your jewish friends away.

  6. This is funny!  How on Earth did you happen to acquire this cement pig?  Certainly, it couldn't just "fall" into your pocket like other souveniers of your life.  Do tell...this might be good! I like him....and now that he's famous you can't possibly ever get rid of him!

  7. Yes, I would say a cement pig is, umm, different. I like Wilbur. That'a a good, strong name for a pig.

  8. That is one sexy pig!

    Amanda :)

  9. I love the face on that - and I feel sorry for the cat who felt threatened.  Oh, well.  I'm sure there was no lasting harm done! - Karen

  10. I love your piggy!  He is cool!!

    be well,

  11. Just clicked here from your latest entry. I think two of those pigs guarding the house is an excellent idea. I thought I might buy a couple of those huge concrete plant holders in the shape of boots and leave a sign saying "I live here". That might deter intruders. B.