A new job?

    I'm not sure why, but I was poking around in my spam-folder, and it's clear to me that I now have to adjust my settings.  I almost missed out on this incredible opportunity before it wound up in the vast nothingness where most deleted emails go.  Look!  It's got a reference number and everything!  How can this not be legitimate?  Plus, it's China!  And, you know how strict they are about the internet. 

 

    But wait!  There's MORE!  It's got pearls, diamonds, gems and jewelry (calm down, ladies!  I havent been hired yet).  Yes!  Precious jewels!  So precious...  They likes us.  They wants to give us the PRECIOUS!    

 

 

Ref: UK/9420X2/68

I am Mr Cheng Huang President/Founder of  CHINA NATIONAL PEARLS DIAMOND GEM & JEWELRY (CNPDG&J) IMPORT AND EXPORT CORP.

We deal in mining and supply of jewel products and export into America and Canada. Our head office is located in China. I am interested in employing your services, to work with me as our payment agent who can help us establish a medium of receiving payment on our behalf for goods supplied to our customers in America and Canada.  Please if you are interested in transacting business with us we will be very glad.  Further more you will be entitled to 10% of every payment that you are able to receive for us from our customers. Please contact us for more information. All you have to do is send me your full name, detailed mailing address, telephone and fax numbers.

 

(The following are questions from the email with my answers in red)

 

1. Full Name: Zongo the Magnificent

2. Full Contact/Mailing Address: Maytag Box #4 behind Gus's House of Boiled Goat.

3. Phone and Fax Numbers: I'm currently between Phone and Fax Numbers.

4. Date and Place of Birth: The Tuesday that it rained. Lome, Togo.

5. Next Of Kin: My only significant other is a tuna-salad sandwich.

6. Present Occupation: Bastard step-child.

7. Average Yearly Income: Oh. That sounds like math to me.

 

Regards,

Mr. Cheng Huang.President.CHINA NATIONAL PEARLS DIAMOND GEM & JEWELRY (CNPDG&J)

 

 Keep those fingers crossed for me, okay?