Hiya, kind reader people.
You may have noticed that things here have considerably slowed over this last week. There are two reasons for this:
First, as usual, these hands and fingers of mine are screaming painful, and typing has, once again, become something of a huge chore. On the plus side, I get my lovely infusion of Remicade next week (more pudding! Yes!), and that usually helps a smidge.
Now, on the plus, PLUS side, I get the spend the next week just absolutely hammered on pain killers. For example, this morning, I woke up in a world of head-to-toe hurt, and today's breakfast was a simple one. It included a pot of coffee, two cherry-flavored Twizzlers, an ice-cream sandwich and a couple of Vicodin. An omlette would have been nifty, and though apparently I'm a chef (I say "merde" a lot, and I read somewhere that the definition of a chef is a cook who swears in French), with only two reasonably good fingers, I moved on to easier, less-healthy, alternatives. But, if you've never had an ice-cream sandwich for breakfast, I suggest you give it a try. It plays wonderfully well with coffee.
The other reason I've been slowed down is that I finally believe that the ex-girlfriend/girlfriend and I have reached the end of our tumultuous seven-and-a-half year relationship.
I'm not terribly broken up about it. But, there is a nagging, little pang of regret that seeps in now and then to gnaw on my good mood with its dull, little molars. I mean, you waste that much time trying to love the unlovable, and there's going to be some feelings of annoyance. It's like lutefisk. People claim to love it, but try eating it every damn day for seven and a half years. Trust me, the faces you will make will run the gamut from happiness to mock-happiness to disgust and, finally, absolute horror to the point where if you see a plate of the stuff, you'll start screaming and running around until you find a window to jump through as you beg for death's sweet embrace.
The fact is, I just got kind of tired with all the on-off silliness. So, for the first time ever, I tossed all that unconditional nonsense out the window and started issuing ultimatums willy-nilly. I'm getting old, after all, and I think I could go for something at least alittle stable. There's a whole heap of security in that, I think, and security is a pretty handy thing in my world.
So, there's a bit of a dark cloud hanging over me. But, it's only a week, so it's not too bad.
-DP
--
Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 8/30/2007 10:21:00 AM
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No matter what your age the on-off thing is annoying and frustrating. I myself have only did that once w/ my HS sweetheart and only bc of how many first we shared. By the end of those 4 wasted years I was so ready for it to be over I just sat in the drive way one night until he made his decision, which took over an hour. And I was fine. All my GF's were ready to comfort me w/ ice cream and gossip but I never shed 1 tear. I was too worn out by the back and forths. Anyway wish you the best.
ReplyDeleteRhianna
Hope the sun comes out again soon my friend. B.
ReplyDeleteAwwww Dan, I hope you get over her soon, it's a long time mate to have known someone even if she drove ya nuts sometimes.
ReplyDeleteGaz
{{{{DAN}}}} It is probably long past time when unconditional needed to start being balanced with stability and normality and, well, "shit or get off the pot," as my otherwise lady-like mother would say. Understood, including that pang that may take some time.
ReplyDelete