Monday, August 28, 2006

How I Spent My Summer Vacation.

    No.  Unfortunately, I didn't get to play baseball with my favorite Japanese team.  I just yanked this picture off the website, and well...  you desperately needed to see it, I think.  Someday, however, it is my dream to pitch for the Bastards.  I think that's the only way I can justify my utter lack of control.  In short, if I'm pitching at your head, it's not because I suck as a pitcher.  Nope.  It's because I'm a Bastard.

    Anyway, the time off was well-spent.  I went golfing and managed to get an outstanding score of 70.  Then again, my math skills completely suck, so there's a pretty decent chance that I forgot to carry at least a few ones (and possibly a couple of twos).  So, honestly, my score could be anywhere between 65 and 378.  The margin of error is just that high. 

    I did go camping.  I'd forgotten how utterly horrible the camping experience actually is.  When the sun was up, it's was a nice time.  Without it though, it's a cold, damp, unhappy hell spent getting gang-raped by mosquitoes who seem to have a drinking problem as we huddled around a weak fire right out of a freakin' Jack London novel.  I didn't even catch a fish.  Everyone else caught a fish.  The only thing I managed to catch was a cold.  Screw nature.  It should all be slashed and burned and paved over to build Wal-Marts and NASCAR tracks.  I would die if stranded in the woods.  Therefore, that threat to my life must be destroyed.  I mean, what kind of retard can't catch a friggin' fish in a tiny pond that's packed full of them?  And fire without gas is just not possible to me.  From now on, I'm going fishing with pipe-bombs, and if I don't see smoke-jumpers raining down from the heavens, I'm not going to be satisfied with my campfire. 

     Aside from that, my computer is currently all repaired and working happily, I think.  They put in a new hinge that looks like it belongs in the space program.  And, it's made out of a strange material called "metal" --a material that seems to be lacking ona great many computer-related products these days. 

    Okay, now it seems I've got a load of catching up to do.  I hope everyone has managed to spin over and congratulate John Scalzi for winning the Campbell Award for Best New Writer at this year's Hugo ceremony.  If there's one thing I like better than seeing bad things happen to bad people, it's when really good things happen to really good people.  Way to go, John. 



  1. Welcome back. Great photo!
    Missed ya,

  2. Hi Dan, welcome home, BABY!

  3. Hello mate, I've missed ya. I can only agree wholeheartedly re the camping experience. Give me four and five star hotels where waiters are fighting to serve you drinks and the food is brought to the table and the meal always ends with a brandy. B.

  4. Back and bettern ever.

  5. dear Dan,
    errr.did you make it back ok?

  6. LOL... I hate camping and you just confirmed for me that my hubby is never going to convince me or my dd9 to try it... ever.  I mean, I told him on our first date that my idea of camping was to stay at a Holiday Inn instead of a Marriott or Hyatt or Four Seasons... I think it is plain that I am not a camping kinda girl.  Nuff said.  Rain happens.  

    Glad you are back, hope you feel better soon, now that you are back in the big city!  lol

    Yes, I congrat'd John... so awesome!

    be well,

  7. Welcome back bud!


  8. welcome back. I would only like camping if there was a hotel on the camp grounds. LOL. Seems like a good score in golf.