[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] D-Day!

Well folks, today's my birthday. And yes. The never-ending strides of time have driven me into 40 this time around, and I'm honestly not too sure how to feel about that.

Anyway, I'm going to be off the remainder of the day trying to figure out how to act like a 40 year old. If you've got any pointers, please feel free to leave them in the comments.

Aside from that, for your enjoyment, here's a picture that is entirely un-birthdayish.

See? There are perks to living along the lake. The fog really makes the world a weird place.

Now, I am off to hunt for cake! Have a great day, everyone!

-DP

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Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 6/06/2008 08:58:00 AM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Yaaarrgh!

Today, in between the intermittent moments where electricity is running through the veins and capillaries of the house, I am currently shaking my fist at technology. We had some big, nasty storms plow through here last night, and things are all a little dodgy.

Fortunately, I'm on a laptop, so if the power does disappear, I won't lose everything. Still, when the power goes bye-bye, it takes my router and everything else with it. But, at least I can cower in the darkness and click and clack away on my machine with minimal loss.

Anyway, I'm off today. I've been in a weird mood the last couple of days, and I'm just going to blob in front of the TV and stare at the static since, for some weird reason, my cable just went out. So, I'm just going to pretend I'm watching a massive battle between white ants and black ants.

Right now, they look about even, by the way.

So, you all have a great day, and I'll catch up with you tomorrow.

Peace out, folks!

-DP

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Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 6/05/2008 03:06:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Cutting a Rug... Big Time!

So, you think you can dance?

Take a look at this.

Trust me. You can't dance.

I wouldn't last five seconds doing this. In fact, the last time I moved like that, I was falling ass over tea-kettle down a very steep hill. There was no music. It was just me, some wailing, and the constant refrain of my body slapping a muddy slope.

Still... It was fun. But, it wasn't anything close to dancing.

-DP

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Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 6/04/2008 10:32:00 AM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Tempus... Tempus... Fugit!

Yes. I'm running around today, and, unfortunately, most of my running has been complicated by a mountain of aches and pains and what have you. The weather here took a turn from the Monday's 80+ degrees into something cold, gray, rainy and miserable. So, I'm thinking that most of the trouble is the result of that.

Anyway, for today's picture, here's yet another shot of my birdbath:

This is yet another of those accidental shots. I was shooting into the sunset to get some cool ambient light, but I forgot to adjust my camera settings. So, I wound up with a ridiculously fast shutter speed and, to compensate, the camera raised the ISO to a very high and very grainy 1600.

So, it's really noisy from shooting at 1600, but I think the noise really adds a lot to this shot, and it helps to accent the sunbeams and lens flare.

Clearly, if I had shot it as people are supposedly supposed to according to the "experts," this picture would be kind of mundane. So, it just goes to show you that, sometimes, doing it your own way is the best.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy it.

-DP

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Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 6/03/2008 01:09:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] What Can Blonde-Star Do for You?

Here's a story courtesy of KUTV.com and the whacky kids over on Fark.

Woman Calls Orem Police To Free Her From Her Locked Car

Automatic car features are supposed to make life easier for motorists, but they may be leaving some people without the know-how to do things the old-fashioned way. That’s what happened to a driver in Utah County who became trapped inside her own car.

A woman called Orem police Friday afternoon needing help because her battery died and she was locked inside her car.

When police arrived, they found the woman sitting in the car, unable to get herself out. She couldn’t hear the officers instructions through the rolled-up windows so she motioned to them to call her on her cell phone, according to police.

Once officers were able to talk to the woman on the phone, they were able to tell her how to manually operate the slide lock mechanism on the inside door panel to open the door and free herself.

“I'm just glad she had a cell phone to call for help,” an officer said.

Umm... It's hard to say what I would have done had I been in the officer's position. I'd have probably helped the poor woman, but, to be honest, it wouldn't be easy since I'm certain Darwin would have been on my shoulder whispering in my ear, "Dude! I've totally got this one."

Of course, the whole thing reminds me of how I like to take the doors off my Jeep and drive my friends around. Whenever we park somewhere and get out, I always make it a point to tell them to lock the doors. Surprisingly, the girlfriend/ex-girlfriend handles this well, and just simply says "whatever, stupid." However, more than a few of my chums have been suckered by my silly little antics, and they just look at me with a funny sort of panic and confusion and ask "how?"

Still... locking yourself in your car takes a special kind of daft, methinks.

-DP


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Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 6/02/2008 02:58:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Oops!

Bored?

Well... Take a look at the 150 Funniest Resume Mistakes.

Currently, my personal favorite is the individual who proudly “Finished eighth in my class of ten.”

-DP


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Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 6/02/2008 01:32:00 PM

[The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind] Coffee?

I must do as Dawn says, or suffer the consequences, and seeing as how she lives in New Jersey, I'm pretty sure she's got a mob connection, and those consequences could probably find me in a nice pair of cement shoes at the bottom of a river.

So, for Dawn...

Unfortunately, this picture is not a picture of coffee. However, after looking at it, I suppose it could be.

What it actually is, is a picture of my little, gurgly, garden fountain that was so horribly blown-out and over-exposed, there was pretty much no saving it. So, I cranked everything to the darkest it could possibly go without completely blacking it out, and I kind of liked what I wound up with.

Still, it's not coffee. Of course, that doesn't mean that I'm not sitting here wishing my garden fountain was pumping piping hot coffee through its plumbing instead of dirty water. I mean, how awesome would that be? I could have one for hot coffee, and I'd set up another one for cold beer. I'd probably be the coolest kid on the block.

Then again, it is outside, and well... I don't trust my neighbors. I'm sure they'd clean me out since they're nothing but a bunch of dumb, beer-swilling rednecks with sticky, Kool-Aid mustachioed children and dogs that yelp into the wee hours.

Anyway, I hope you like it.

-DP

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Posted By Dan to The Wisdom of a Distracted Mind at 6/02/2008 01:11:00 PM